the end.

Woow. I wasn't expecting this to happen so fast. Actually, my inner being knew that things were going wrong, but I thought it had a solution, but. That phone call destroyed the little parts of my heart that had been just repaired of a bad relationship before. It did hurt, a lot. I swear. I was so shocked. Inmediately I run away to my bedroom, laid down and cover my head with my pillow, some relaxing music in my iPod and started thinking about it all. IT WAS ALL MY FAULT. I was the guilty of suffering, in all the relationships I had ever had. Why was I so masoquistic? I knew that he wasn't to be the ONE, the 'serious' boyfriend I was looking for, but anyway, my heart started falling in love again, (or for the first time?) and I wasn't able to stop it, until it crushed again. It crushed so hard, so hard that it started bleeding more than the last time it did. So, well... 'I'm not prepared for this' OK. So, hurting huh?, I broke up with him obviously by internet, 'cause if i had broken up with him watching him in his eyes, I wouldn't have been capable to resist him, I would have started crying so badly and I'd start asking to God why all my relationships sucked so hard, all in front of you... thanks God I didn't do it using that way. Now, I don't know if I regret, or what. I do miss you. I don't know what to do. If I get back with you, I know I'm gonna suffer, because you're not the right one for me. You want something I do NOT want. But I miss you, if I don't get back with you. My heart keeps bleeding... How the heck am I going to sleep tonight?